Why Little Jews Are So Wiry

Nearly Extinct "New York" Jew of the Woods

I have noticed that the size of a Jew is directly in proportion to his or her level of “wiriness.” Big Jews are not only less of a threat, they are also rather rare. National geographic list large Jews on the endangered species list, just under the scourge of conservative ponds everywhere, the homosexual salamander. Medium sized Jews assimilate nicely into society and are often missed or mistaken for “innocent lawyers.” Small Jews though, they are truly who you need to look out for, especially if you have money in your pocket or have children with money in their pockets. They can smell unspent money from up to two miles away, and if they do corner you, your only hope to escape is to compromise with them and at least allow them to invest it for you.